Thursday, September 27, 2007

STUDENT RIOTS - UNREST QUELLED

The longsuffering population of University City on planet Warheen, could breathe a sigh of relief as the Adhoc Task Force(ATF) consisting of Warheen planetary security, Imperial Marine detachments as well as regular Imperial Army, destroyed the last of the occupied factories controlled by syndicalist unions in collusion with radical students. The planetwide riots, according to our sources, originally sparked by the publication of an undergraduate philosophy thesis titled 'Dialectic Historical Materialism and the Platonic Notion of Enlightened Despotism - An Empirical Rebuttal', had threatened to engulf the entire planet in civil disorder, as fringe radical groups allied with disaffected trade unionists under slogans like 'Historical Determinism ate my paycheck', 'The Emperor is not an acceptable answer to class-struggle contradictions!' and the ubiquitos 'Smash the system' and 'Hang the last Officer with the entrails of the last Bureaucrat!'.


The author of the thesis Raymond Goreanas, was arrested by ATF troops and after a short tribunal, is being transferred to a labour reeducation camp in an un-named agricultural colony on the Ak'Han fringe. Senior Officials responded to criticisms of excessive leniency in this case, as well as calls to ban the teaching of Philosophy in Imperial University, by pointing towards the infallibility of the Enlightened Despotism thesis, and arguing that one of the axioms of this thesis was the despotism in question being enlightened. The surviving faculty of Warheen's philosophy department(which was hit by a stray orbital missile in the fighting) have already published an article named "Nihilism Revealed - An Exploration of The Ontological Flaws of Empirically Motivated Criticisms of Classical Platonic Social Theory." A spokesmen for the central Imperial government asked for calm and encouraged all citizens with an interest in political science to read the latest article to still their doubts as to the ideal nature of the current regime.

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